Hey everyone. New here. Trying to get more in control of my drinking. In retrospect and just now thinking about it, I've had periods in my life completely dry, then with some binge drinking in there (hello college, adult events parties after my kids got a bit older), but now my habit is daily and its clearly affecting my health and well being. About a year and a half ago, as my kids got older (now teens) I was able to get a sense of freedom and started going to more social events, attending parties, drinking was always acceptable, and welcome. I live in a beach town where drinking at 10 am is the norm. When I went out I would have a few drinks but never have a problem getting up in the morning and was only drinking 1-2 times a week. I never was "hungover", maybe a few times here and there. Sometime around the turn of this year, my business slowed down and I noticed I was drinking more frequently, probably to forget and relax, and sometimes a lot more than I should (regularly drinking liquor in addition to wine and beer which was something I rarely ever did) until a few months ago I realized I was drinking every day, mostly at home after my kids were in bed. Now its a problem and I think I have only gone 2-3 days without a drink in the last 2 months. After a night of super heavy drinking while I was travelling in early march, right before we were ordered to stay home, I woke up after a night of heavy drinking with the shakes and numbness and tingling in my feet. Couldn't get my head about me for an entire day. I am also a pack a day smoker and the combination is taking its toll on my body. I've told a lot of friends that I have an issue with alcohol and they laugh it off because I'm so put together and rarely act any differently when I'm drinking. I know I'm not ready to give alcohol up completely but I have to find a way to get in control. I come from a long line of alcoholics in my family and now I'm one of them. ย