Hi all. I'm so glad I found this service. I was never really a problem drinker until I left my job several years ago to move across the country for graduate school. I found myself alone, stressed, and depressed, and wine and bourbon seemed to be my only constant companions. By the time I graduated I was drinking up to 2 bottles of wine a night and had put on close to 30 lbs.
Five years later I've shed some of those bad habits and a little bit of that weight, but my roommate recently confronted me and told me that he was seriously concerned about how much I had sunk into those old habits during quarantine. It was the first time anyone has ever done that for me, and as embarrassed as it made me, I realized he was right.
I am hopeful that this combination of support and treatment will help me figure out what a "healthy" relationship with alcohol might look like for me--or if it's even possible at all.
Hi @neeners ! Welcome! I am so glad you've found us too! First, thank you for sharing your story. I know many, many, many in the community can relate -- so, you are not alone.
On a personal note, I understand the feeling of being blindsided by problematic drinking -- going 0-100 in a matter of months. I also want to say it's incredibly admirable to have shed any of those habits. It is not easy, presumably without the necessary support (at least that was my experience -- white-knuckling is beyond challenging). I also completely empathize with the feelings of embarrassment that come with being confronted by a friend. I want you to know that there is nothing embarrassing about what you're going through. We are not our drinking. Taking action is the first step, and I hope you recognize how courageous that is.
Now, with a few years of sobriety under my belt, I can say (with confidence!) that if changing my relationship to alcohol happened for me, it can absolutely happen for you. It has brought me so much freedom and abundance. It's one day at a time, taking steps forward and giving yourself compassion when there are steps back. Everyone's path is different. So, I am rooting for you, and I know you got this.
Thank you so much! I really appreciate the support! It may take me a little while to open up and be truly honest, even in an anonymous platform like this, but I need to be brave and realize that you are right--that it is a process, and that I have to be kind to myself too.