This is harder than I thought.
Some days I don't feel 'right', nothing feels 'right', if I don't have that first sip. Which makes everything 'right'. Everything hurts. People irritate me. Take that first one, bliss.
I know I need help. I just don't know how do I commit myself, and I can't visualize my life without it. It's terrifying. I would rather drink than feel angry about everything and anything.
Hi @enthusiastic_spruce_377 ! This totally makes sense to me, and I can relate! Not having a clear-cut direction in place is overwhelming, especially when you may know you need help but don't know where to get it. I hope we can be a resource for you, and that you can find some reprieve here. I encourage you to check out our free, therapist-moderated support groups and our treatment plans. We'll be here every step of the way. One of the most formative pieces of advice I've received in my sobriety is to walk through fear and not around it! You got this.
Hi,
I was stuck there where you’re at for a few years And it SUCKED. Thinking i couldn’t be the best me or even socialize/function unless I was drinking. If I wasn’t drinking I hated everything and everyone. I knew I had a problem and I didn’t know how to fix it or where to even start.
I suggest to start by seeking any type of professional help (therapist, AA, impatient or outpatient treatment) or even an online support group like this (there many online you can join) to start getting your thoughts out and hearing other people’s story’s. It’s not a fast process it takes time, see it like this your problem didn’t happen over night so your recovery won’t happen overnight either.
I’ve been drug free for over a year and been struggling on and off with alcohol for the past year Thinking I could still drink in moderation, it took some more bad situations to realize I can’t do that either, at least not right now. I tell myself not right now because not ever drinking again feels overwhelming.
Right now I’m 7 days no alcohol, so all I could suggest is just keep trying even after setbacks just keep trying. don’t give up on yourself and your life, you are worth it!
Hope this helps.....
Love everything juju said above.
I have decided not to make that giant goal (for right now) that "I'm never going to drink again". I am taking it day by day, in the two days I have taken the Naltrexone, I have gone from 1-2 bottles of wine or a few glasses of wine and 5-6 crown & cokes a night to 1 crown and coke.
I know it's early but I'm going to keep taking the Naltrexone and see where it takes me. If I continue to have one or two drinks a night, it's still WAY better than my usual EVERY day routine. If I skip a drink at night, well that will be a bonus to me. I know there are people who are goal oriented (which is usually me) but I am tired of making a goal and never attaining it. which made me angry with myself and a great excuse to argue with everyone.
Anyway, good luck on your journey- feel free to reach out anytime. :)